My Brief Thoughts on the Satanic Panic @WeisMargaret #DnD #RPG #SatanicPanic

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Margaret Weis, as nerds tend to do from time to time, recently reraised the issue of the Satanic Panic, sharing one of her anecdotes and inspiring others to do the same.

I don’t want to share an anecdote, but rather make some general comments. I was a victim of this bullshit. Though my father was present until the day he died, my mother did all of the child rearing, and she’s an infallibility-of-the-Pope Catholic. (She may not be because Pope Francis isn’t conservative enough, but I wouldn’t know because I no longer speak with her.) As the primary authority figure, she wasn’t fond of me playing D&D. Note well that her favorite way of disciplining me when I was too young to resist was hitting me with a metal spoon with a sharp edge to it. This was no small matter. Another way she liked to discipline me was to give my older brother a free pass to beat the shit out of me daily. They were both part of the Satanic Panic mistreatment.

I have an opinion as to why these dipshits were in such a panic. First, though, I want to assure you that I don’t want to insult the faithful generally. I’m an agnostic, but I see the value to religion, so if you’re religious, I’m cool with it. In fact, in my early days of congoing, I’ve helped make sure some of you found a church to attend in an unfamiliar city. You don’t have to be this way in order to be faithful, but some of you are.

I think D&D was seen as competition for my mother, et al. Even though I saw Zeus, Thor, Shango, and Raiden as the center of fun stories, they saw them as competitors to their religious thrones. I apologize for the offense this will cause, but I agree. They are competitors, because the philosophies, stories, and views of many of the religious even today aren’t much less ridiculous to me than those of the ancient people who would see a microwave oven as witchcraft. This is consistent with the fact that a lot of faith is placed in the writings of ancient people who, in fact, would also see a microwave oven as witchcraft. One who blindly accepts the words of people like that isn’t much better than those people.

Regardless of the psychological rationale, and regardless of your lack of experience with it, the Satanic Panic was real, as was the needless hurt it caused a lot of people. If anyone denies or understates the existence of the Satanic Panic, they’re either lying or ignorant as to its scope.

Perhaps both.

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Dungeons & Dragons is a trademark of Wizards of the Coast, LLC, who neither contributed to nor endorsed the contents of this post. (Okay, jackasses?)

The Best Lolth @TheRealLolth #DnD #RPG #Lolth

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Good gravy. Nerds have found yet another stupid thing to fight about. Well, I’m not one to say I’m better than anyone else, so I’m jumping into the fray.

This is the best Lolth (hyperlinked because I’m no copyright infringer!). Here’s another source in case that one disappears. That’s right. Just like the rest of the nerds, I think it’s not merely my opinion, but objective fact, and the world depends on everyone accepting that.

Don’t get me wrong. This sort of thing could be fun if you’d approach it that way. Unfortunately, the edition wars still rage on, so we’ve learned nothing.

Do you hear how ridiculous it sounds? Just because of this, I’m doing another mean post today.

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Nerds Are Just So … Nerdy #nerd #candy

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The latest nerd war inspired me to write another mean post. Actually, I wrote it some time ago but was unsure I wanted to post it. Now I’m sure. During my time in Facebook jail, or maybe shortly before that (I’m old; I don’t remember), a fellow nerd shared this meme.

Sad news: They weren’t thinking of you specifically when they named the candy.

Nothing says nerd like a meme that showcases your insecurity. C.f.,

Andy Wong on Twitter | Fantasy football funny, Fantasy football, Football  funny
Having done both for decades, I can firmly say no, they aren’t the same. They just have superficial similarities that dumb and/or ignorant people confuse with identity.

These don’t come across as quite the burn you think they do. Instead, they make you look, well, nerdy and insecure. Moreover, the people you’re targeting aren’t paying attention because they don’t care what you think. That’s the nature of “not being a nerd.” More importantly, the meme falls short of its intended mark. Consider that following candy bar names:

The truth is that candy bar names run the gamut — everyone’s looking for a distinctive trademark — but because we picked the fight with this meme, it’s appropriate to point out that the ones I listed were named after a specific person worthy of recognition. Can you name a specific nerd who was worthy of a candy bar name? Einstein? Hawking? Me? The first two are famous, and they don’t get a candy name. And don’t try to pull cookies into this. It won’t work as well as many seem to think it will.

We remain individually obscure and just get picked on as a group, and obviously some of us aren’t self-aware enough to realize that yes, this candy name is probably just picking on us. Don’t pick battles you can’t win. If one of those “cool people” accidentally hears what you said, you’re gonna lose.

Even a freaking horse did better than we.

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It’s Magic! #MCU #DnD #RPG

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I love merging two worlds that I love. In this case, it’s D&D and the MCU.

I think I’m getting some ideas for some characters . . . .

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CDC Announcement @GregoryStringer @CDCgov #MythologyMonday

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The CDC just updated its guidelines once again.

I don’t care what the CDC says. I’m keeping my earplugs.

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In case the tweet is ever deleted, here’s a screenshot.


Here’s a Conspiracy Theory I Can Get Behind @weeklyworldnews #gaming #ttrpg #rpg

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Going forward, Sundays are lazy days for me. I either post something silly or other people’s work. Usually both. Today, I give you a conspiracy theory that’s right up my alley care of the most trusted name in news media.

You must admit that this would explain the coexistence of Ohio and the Appalachian Mountains in such close proximity.

I want it to be true, so it is.

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In case the tweet is deleted, here’s a screenshot.

Jesus Loves Football #Caturday

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I don’t like discussing sports here. I keep that on another blog for that, even though I don’t really blog there anymore. However, this blog is certainly a place for goofy Caturday fare, and I do like to point out that this meme will never die, so here you go.

Don’t be afraid, nerds.

Not nerdy enough? How about this one?

Pin by Richard Mathias on Dungeons and dragons | Memes, Smudging, Cat memes
But this one isn’t funny.

Smudge is my spirit animal.

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I’ve Still Got Nothing @Partynerdz #MCU

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Just like yesterday, I’ve still got nothing. Look, work’s been tough lately, so here are a couple more silly MCU memes.

Care of Party Nerdz https://partynerdz.com/

Is this one better?

Nebula’s hair makes no sense.

I’d be cool with Hemsworth doing this well into his 80s.

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I’ve Got Nothing #MCU

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I’ve been getting crushed at work recently. Today is the first weekday I’ve gotten to the gym since Wednesday of last week, and it’s also the first day since Monday of last week that I didn’t stay a couple extra hours. So with no time even to think of something to write, let alone actually put it to digital ink, here’s a silly meme for you.

It isn’t even that funny. Dammit.

As I said, I’ve got nothing.

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Tuvix @StarTrek @paramountplus @StarTrekOnPPlus @netflix @hulu #StarTrek #Tuvix #Voyager

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I’ve never been a fan of Star Trek: Voyager. It’s Star Trek, so it can’t be all bad, but as far as I’m concerned, it’s the weakest entry in the franchise. Star Trek used to be a morality play first, and bells and whistles second. Some of the later series have lost sight of that at times, and so have some fans, which is they’re loss as far as I’m concerned. However, I recently rediscovered season 2, episode 24, Tuvix, and it may very well be the most Star Trek of Star Trek episodes ever.

Spoilers ahead.

I’m assuming that the reader knows something about the series, though you need not know the series to understand the moral dilemma in play. Tuvok and Neelix are merged into a single person due to a transporter mishap. The resulting person, who calls himself, Tuvix, is initially more than willing to have himself separated, but the technology wasn’t there at the time. Two weeks (or so) later, Harry and the Doctor figure out how to do it, but by that point Tuvix has changed his mind (minds?). When Tuvix is told that there’s a “solution” to his “problem,” he essentially responds that he doesn’t want to be executed, and at one point refers to it as murder. He’s developed friendships and has smoothly resumed his professional responsibilities as tactical officer while occasionally cooking for the crew. In fact, there’s a synergy. It’s clear that he’s a better tactical officer and chef then he was before (though one might expect that he can’t do the work of two men).

Seriously, these are the spoilers.

Nevertheless, when Janeway makes the decision to separate him back into Tuvok and Neelix, the major players in the show: Paris, Chakotay, Kes, and Harry are all in agreement. There’s a logic to that sentiment; you can’t replace a relationship years in the making with a new guy who showed up two weeks ago. However, that doesn’t remove the underlying moral dilemma.

My personal view is that the separation was appropriate. Tuvix defended his right to live in part by arguing that Tuvok and Neelix were still alive in a sense by existing within him. That one fell on deaf ears for me, as you could turn that argument around on him. Once separated, Tuvix would exist in the same sense within the reformed Tuvok and Neelix. I think what puts me over the edge is that I feel like we’re choosing two lives over one, as Tuvok and Neelix still exist in my view. They’re essentially in prison.

But you can’t ignore the fact that Tuvix is, in all ways that we understand, a unique person with his own thoughts, feelings, and relationships, no less a person perhaps than a so-called “test tube baby,” but certainly as much as an android like Data, a life form created by technology rather than biology. Even within two weeks, he’s grown as a personality. Whether or not you think he should have been separated, this decision shouldn’t be easy. I was disappointed with how happy everyone (except Janeway and the Doctor) seemed to be when the separation was complete. To my knowledge, this episode was never brought up again later in the series. That’s a shame. I wish that a later episode of Voyager had required Janeway to reexamine her decision, perhaps giving her an analogous scenario where she went in the opposite direction. The fact that it didn’t is yet more reason to view the writing in Voyager as the weakest link in the franchise.

Tuvix is currently available to stream on Paramount+, Netflix, and Hulu (at least in the United States). Give it a watch.

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