Let's roll some dice, watch some movies, or generally just geek out. New posts at 6:30 pm ET but only if I have something to say. Menu at the top. gsllc@chirp.enworld.org on Mastodon and @gsllc on Twitter.
I posted this goofy meme across social media this past week.
I received a not-so-goofy response. Long story short, Zephyr the Dream Dragon on Mastodon responded that he’d never want to use wand-wielding conductors as models because he’s worried he’d get sued by J.K. Rowling. Now, I think Zephyr gets it. I think Zephyr realizes that any such lawsuit would be frivolous. But not everyone does, and that’s a huge problem. It also pisses me off.
I’ve had too many conversations with too many people that think the WotC’s open gaming license (“OGL”) and its clones are legitimate licenses. WotC’s OGL is most certainly not, failing on multiplefundamental points, some of which you learn about in the first week or so of Contracts Law class. (Even when they get something right, it’s a potential disaster.) My posts on the ORC raise some doubts, but certainly leave open the possibility that the ORC is a legitimate license (albeit an unnecessary one) under very narrow set of circumstances and making some huge assumptions as to how courts will rule. However, even if enforceable, the ORC misstates the law and contains clearly unenforceable language designed to do nothing else but make you think they’re doing something better than WotC. That dishonesty is the symptom of a larger disease.
All of these gaming companies that are producing OGLs knowing full well that they’re probably not enforceable, and in any event can be done in a better way (public domain).
So, when (for example) both Paizo and WotC claim, implicitly or expressly, that single words can be copyrighted, or even that short phrases can be copyrighted, it’s no small matter. Too many people, whether they understand the ridiculousness of the claim or not, abide by their wishes and self-censor, as do the multitude of those that do believe that to be true.*** That’s utter horseshit. The purpose of copyright isn’t to reward artists for their hard work; that’s just a mechanism to achieve the true goal. The true goal is to give us, the public in general, an environment rich in art. But if copyright is used to suppress the creativity of artists, why have it? In fact, doing so is copyright misuse, but how often is that punished?
*** My point is that, while I can’t fix economic issues that cause your self-censorship, I can certainly fix legal misunderstandings that cause it, but you have to be willing to accept that you’ve been fooled all these years.
What we really need is a cheap tribunal (think small claims court of copyright infringement) that’s not as narrowly useful as what we currently have. People should be able to fight frivolous claims of copyright infringement regardless of their financial means or legal sophistication, and they should be able to do so relatively quickly. That’s far easier said than done, but our system doesn’t even try, and as much as it pains me to say this, if the copyright (or any) system runs contrary to its own purpose for existing, it shouldn’t exist. I don’t want that, because a properly constructed copyright system can be extremely beneficial to society. So, I’d desperately like to see us fix it, and the RPG industry’s misstatements of the law are an unnecessary barrier to that goal.
— Rob Bodine, also gsllc@chirp.enworld.org (@GSLLC) July 15, 2023
Screenshot below in case either tweet is ever deleted.
I shared a screenshot of Jason’s tweet to other social media, including Facebook, and most who responded agreed that it was funny, sometimes rolling with the joke and adding more. Sure enough, I found the one rotten apple in the bunch.
It went on further, but why burden you with that?
I guess “girls” need to avoid this guy, because he just refuses to have fun. The funny thing is, Mike was one of the people that reacted to the post with a laughter emoji. Go figure.
As promised yesterday, here’s a funny story from my only other Origins trip in 2009.
Something I didn’t mention in the video: I remember clearly that the swag I received for working the convention included the newly released Eberron Player’s Guide for 4th Edition Dungeons & Dragons. It wasn’t a complete stretch to think that Keith would have been there, but sitting down at a Living Forgotten Realms table to play an ordinary game was a bit of a stretch.
I saw Keith Baker hanging out with Luke Gygax at a bar at Origins last weekend, but I wasn’t going to interrupt them with this story about a guy he didn’t know (Steve) being told by another guy (me) he didn’t know for an incident in which he played no part.
I’m back from my second-ever Origins trip, the last being 2009. I took today (Monday) off because I knew I’d need to decompress, so I’m taking this time to record two videos. The first is below. The second will go up tomorrow.
Here’s a good thing I forgot to mention in the video. For logistical reasons, my diet went to hell on this trip, and I hit the gym only once in three days, but because of all the running around and carrying of heavy objects, I returned home at the same weight at which I left.
Moving on, this was a work trip. Here are some images of the “Learn to Play” game I ran. They used a model of a ship made by WizKids, which I’m told runs for $250. For what it’s worth, considering how overpriced WizKids minis are, that seems like a good deal. It’s not something everyone can afford, but at least it isn’t a genuine rip off.
The decks at either end of the ship can be removed to expose the lower decks beneath them.
That rudder moves. The only disappointing thing about this model is that the magnets holding the masts in place are too week, and there’s no magnet holding the helm in place. Still, this model provides some impressive detail.
Notice that the flaps can be opened to allow for the cannons to fire. Unfortunately, there are no cannons included. FYI, the watery battlemap costs $60.
I’m no dick. Well, actually, I am, but I was given express permission to show these players on social media.
The woman on the left had never played an RPG before that day, yet she was the first of only two players that exploited my command in the smartest way possible. I said, “Place your minis anywhere you want on the boat.” You see that archer mini on what is effectively the crow’s nest? That’s hers, completely safe from what I was about to unleash on the party. Good job, newbie.
I had a lot of fun goofing off wither everyone. While most players in my slot were experienced players looking for a 2-hour slot instead of a 4-hour slot, this was about introducing new players to the game. Those players don’t have preconceived notions as to how they’re “supposed” to play. They’re an open book and can sometimes be the best players around the table.
You’ll probably have to twist my arm to get me to go back next year.
So, here’s a shitty memory. I had a rough childhood. I won’t go into detail except as relevant to this post, which is relatively tame, but still kind of sucks in a way that gaming nerds will relate.
As a victim of the Satanic Panic, I was forbidden from playing D&D in 1982. Two years later, as a high school sophomore, my cousin introduced me to Barbarian books store in Wheaton, MD (now Barbarian Comics). This is where he bought his comic books. That didn’t interest me at all, but the store also sold RPG material. I knew not to buy D&D materials, but as a high school student, I rebelled a bit and bought FASA Star Trek material. Needless to say, I kept it secret for as long as I could, because that’s still “the same thing” as far as my family was concerned.
I bought the 1st edition box set, the 2nd edition box set, numerous adventures, and a bunch accessories. The accessories included starship models that could be used with that game. Each cost $4.00 (plus tax), so if I bought fifteen of them, that was probably about two weeks pay. Considering I was forced to pay for private high school and college, that’s a fortune, but I can assure you I bought far more than 15 of them. I continued to buy material all the way until the first couple years of college. When my family eventually found my hidden materials, they were largely destroyed. I managed to hide most of my written material, but the starship models were a total loss, and a few accessories disappeared. For a high school/college student in the mid- to late-80s, these were expensive. They were all destroyed by my older brother, who enjoyed enforcing my mother’s prohibition against, well, virtually anything that made me happy, gaming or otherwise.
A couple of years ago, I replenished my entire catalogue of 1st Edition D&D (“1e“) material. There’s nothing I ever owned, or even ever wanted, that I don’t now own. I spent somewhere between $300 and $400, but that bought me more material than I could ever hope to run in the 21 years I statistically have left on this planet. I’m fortunate enough that I afford that. However, take a look at this bullshit. If you didn’t click through (or you’re reading this years after the eBay listing was removed), this is one of those $4.00 models that is selling for $40.00 plus $4.20 shipping. Here’s a screenshot for posterity.
This is an obscure, seldom used starship.
Imagine buying merely fifteen of these now. I’m not a math major, but that should be $633.00 just for materials that aren’t strictly necessary for the game. Buying them at these prices can’t be justified unless you’re truly wealthy.
I’m now running a 1e game for the first time in 40 years, so I’m in no position to complain. However, I’d really love to play FASA Star Trek again. Unfortunately, I know of only two local people that are interested in a in-person game, and one of them isn’t what I’d call “reliable.” (Note: I hate online gaming.) In short, there’s no chance of an in-person game, and certainly none in which I’m a player. That’s a tough pill to swallow, but I can live with that. I’m fortunate to be playing 1e. Moreover, I’m working on starting a 4th Edition D&D game, which also appeals to me. I have plenty going on, and will probably have more than I can handle soon enough.
But as an American, I’m spoiled and want more.
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On June 5th, to (understandably) little fanfare, I announced that I was heading to Origins. I’m leaving on Thursday after work, so I won’t be getting into Columbus, OH until after midnight. That means my effective schedule is as follows:
Friday
9 am – 1 pm
Free
Friday
2 pm – 6 pm
Running games
Friday
7 pm – 11 pm
Running games
Saturday
9 am – 1 pm
Running games
Saturday
2 pm – 6 pm
Free
Saturday
7 pm – 11 pm
Running games
Sunday
9 am – 2 pm
Running games
Sunday
2 pm
Leaving for home.
So, if you want to hang out during my downtime, let me know. I will want to hit the gym Friday morning, but I’m an early riser nowadays, so that shouldn’t get in the way of a breakfast or late morning hangout that day.
Here’s an Idea
I’m bringing some stuff with me. Old school stuff. AD&D stuff. I’ll be prepared to run a 1st Edition D&D version of module S2: White Plume Mountain, and I’m going to try to be able to run module C2: The Ghost Tower of Inverness in case anyone would prefer that. I’ll have pre-generated characters ready to go. This isn’t for an official slot, but if anyone wants to sit down in a hotel lobby and play a 4-hour session of one of those mods on Saturday afternoon, let me know. I’m also willing to grab a table at the convention if Dave has room and everyone would rather meet there, but if so, you’ll have to have a ticket.
If, on the other hand, you just want to hang out, that’s cool too. I tried this as an official game at the last Winter Fantasy, but it didn’t work out, and it certainly wouldn’t surprise me if it didn’t work out at Origins. Still, it can’t hurt to be prepared.
At least, that’s what the U.S. Coast Guard tells us.
One of my favorite villains is fantasy roleplaying is Medusa. In Dungeons & Dragons (“D&D”), that’s a species of creature. In Greek mythology, that’s the name of one of three of her kind, known as Gorgons. Most of you know this, but for those that don’t, here’s one of many videos on them. While I respect the work game designers do, I’m always going to prefer mythological creatures to those game designers invent. Mythology got me into D&D, not the other way around.
3.5 EditionD&D
I love the way D&D has treated medusae generally. I vaguely remember an article in Dragon Magazine during the 3.5 EditionD&D (“3.5e”) days with a writeup on their ecology, which included their male counterparts, the maedar. I never got to use that article because it came towards the end of 3.5e, and I was so caught up in running Living Forgotten Realms and other canned adventures that I didn’t write much of my own material. I always wanted to write a medusa as a BBEG.
4th Edition D&D
In 4th Edition D&D (“4e”), I loved how 4e’s game mechanic was applied to the medusa’s petrifying gaze attack. In 4e, save or die was jettisoned and replaced by what you could call “save thrice in a row or die.” That is, you got three saves over three turns before you were killed, dominated, or whatever. If you saved successfully once during that run, you shook off the effects (though relatively rarely, you still might be subject to an aftereffect on a successful save). This worked really well with the medusa because each failed save during that three-round process resulted in increasingly bad effects. That is, on the first failed save, you were slowed (i.e., speed cut in half). On the second, you were immobilized (i.e., speed of 0). On the third failed save, you were petrified. This gives the player a means to immerse oneself in the action, as the cascade of worsening effects can give you the feeling of slowly turning to stone. (FYI, medusae weren’t the only creature to use this cascade.)
1st Edition D&D
I’m running 1st Edition D&D (“1e”) for the first time in 40 years, so I had forgotten quite a bit. There are a couple of things about medusae that I relearned. First, their gaze attack targets a single creature, whereas in later editions it attacks multiple targets. Second, the gaze is active, not passive. That is, a character merely gazing upon a medusa doesn’t harm the character; the medusa has to intend to petrify the opponent. (See Monster Manual II, page 55 for more information.) While these represent a break from mythology, as you’ll see, they worked to my advantage. One other thing to note is that I house ruled petrification to use the 4e system of slow progression to being petrified.
B2: The Keep on the Borderlands
Going into last session, my group and I knew that we had reached the end of the adventure. So, I told them that I’d be railroading them a little bit to make sure we wrapped things up and that a particular encounter occurred. That encounter was with spoiler alert! a medusa – I named her Xisper – who was captured by inhabitants of the Caves of Chaos and chained to a wall. She used her gaze attack against one PC, but he saved successfully. Some of the PCs held true to their good alignment and refused to allow anyone to kill her but indicated that they’d leave her to her fate, so Xisper immediately went into negotiation mode. Long story short, that negotiation led to them freeing her to clear out the gnoll infestation (the one area the PCs never addressed) and gave me the perfect recurring NPC to bring back at a later date. She’s undoubtably evil, but alignment in my game world is always more complicated than the books present, so she could still be of use to them, and them to her. This is even better than a BBEG.
Xisper will return.
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Dungeons & Dragons is a trademark of Wizards of the Coast, LLC, who neither contributed to nor endorsed the contents of this post. (Okay, jackasses?)
Here’s a screenshot of the PC screen for the character builder:
Westlocke is a pre-generated character from module S4: The Lost Caverns of Tsojcanth.
And here’s Westlocke’s current character sheet. The data I said would be missing has now been added, and you can see that the character sheet is, as I like to call it, “one-stop.” You don’t have to look up spells in hardcover books if you’re using my character sheet, even if those spells come from magic items.
Bathroom stalls have two primary forms of coat hooks (that I can remember). One of them always makes me think of a mind flayer. The one in my office looks like a mind flayer that’s been hit in the head too hard.
Oh, no! I used mind flayer in a sentence! WotC’s gonna sue me!
I saw the D&D movie yesterday. I didn’t like it as much as my average social media contact did, but it was fun and worth watching, and I’ll watch it again when it hits Paramount+. This post is loaded with spoilers, but I’m keeping them relatively mild. Still, proceed at your own risk. TL;DR: I give it a solid B grade.
Well, it is Caturday, isn’t it?
Up front, I want to say that this represents a major step forward for the franchise. In fact, can we just pretend that the other movies don’t exist? I own the second one on DVD and have seen it only once. I can watch it any time I want, and I do exactly that. I watch it every time I want, which is never. But moving on, there are a couple of things I wanted to mention, but I saw the movie by myself, so I didn’t get a chance to talk to anyone about it.
My Favorite Character: The Paladin
For someone like me, this is less a movie and more a homage to the game of D&D, so my favorite character was the paladin. Why? Because the movie made the archetypical paladin, which is a class best summed up by Louis C.K.’s “of course, but maybe” bit. If you don’t already know the bit and don’t click through, this may not make sense.
Of course, paladins are great. Of course, they are. They’re so concerned for everyone else’s well-being and will sacrifice their own. But maaaaaybe they’re all really annoying to be around. But no. Of course, we all love paladins. These people are champions of good, justice, honesty, and virtually everything good in this world. But maaaaaybe if they have such high charismas, they should be expected to learn social skills.
Zenk was the archetypical paladin. You should and will love him, but god dammit he’s annoying.
Legacy v. Modern Gamers
I’m on a real 1st Edition (“1e”) kick, and one of the things that bugs me about modern gaming is the aversion to PC death. This movie had a brilliant opportunity to show modern gamers the value to PC deaths, and when I thought they were going that way, my heart skipped. (Perhaps I should have a cardiogram just in case.) Unfortunately, in typical 5th Edition fashion, they pissed that opportunity away on a cheat. In the process, the cheat mirrored elements of our real-world society that have attention spans too short to remember what’s most important, even if it’s their primary goal in life. This was a major point of failure as far as I was concerned. It wasn’t merely a bad decision, but one that by itself keeps this movie out of the A grade range. It reminded me of my greatest pet peeve with respect to modern gaming.
A Funny Joke with the Same Problem
There’s a joke used in the movie that made it on one of the social media/television spots. It’s where they use a spell to speak with the dead. It was a remarkable failure, and hilariously so. However, they cheated their way out of it. Why? Because modern gamers can’t take a loss. It’s not just death, but some gamers get angry when their character takes a single point of damage (or even no damage!) or miss a puzzle. Modern dungeon masters are expected to avoid character failure of any sort, even when it’s the players’ own damn fault. Sure, the game/movie must continue, but the characters should have to admit they screwed up and find another way forward.
Speaking of Pet Peeves
My largest pet peeve about the prior movies was their overt discussion of game mechanics. That was the one thing I didn’t want in this movie. It’s a fourth wall break, and one that’s completely unnecessary. As a long-time gamer, I don’t need to be told that the character just used Misty Step, and for non-gamers watching the movie, naming the spell won’t add anything to the movie. So in the third movie, Book of Vile Darkness, when the main character asked to purchase a sword, and the shopkeeper asked him whether he wanted one at heroic tier or paragon tier, that was really stupid. That is, even in a world of monsters and magic, no one would talk that way.
This movie avoided such stupidity. In the rare instance where they discussed mechanics (for example, the aforementioned Speak with Dead scene), it served a purpose both to the audience and to the other characters. In fact, the only time language was used that was superfluous to the characters was the discussion of the history of Thay. However, that’s something every movie does because the audience needs the exposition. The characters say, “Yeah, yeah; we knew all that” so that they don’t look stupid, and the audience goes along with the fiction because, in the end, it’s a movie, and audiences know that they need the education. This was definitely something important that this movie got right.
Adventuring Party
Again, they pissed away something that could have improved the movie. You can certainly play the game with four PCs, but you really should have five: a healer, a soldier, an arcane caster, a rogue, and a fifth that doesn’t exactly fit neatly into one of those categories. This is especially true of a movie meant as a love letter to the game. Well, they had a barbarian and a druid that focused on melee, a sorcerer, and a bard that almost never touched a weapon. In fact, all the bard was to the group was a guy who made plans. Don’t get me wrong; he was a fine character, but as someone who likes bards more than any other class in most editions, he didn’t display most of the characteristics of a D&D bard. Moreover, there was no healer in the bunch, not even the druid or underused paladin. For fuck’s sake, they asked the sorcerer to heal someone, and his explanation for why he couldn’t was because of the nature of the injury, not because, you know, he’s not a cleric. But if the producers want to house rule sorcerers as healers, fine. It cuts against everything we’ve seen in every edition, but that kind of flexibility is what RPGs are all about. So why didn’t the sorcerer heal anyone? Because he wasn’t house ruled. He was just a standard sorcerer. There were no healers.
But my main concern here, as small as it is, is that I would have preferred to see a party of five with one of them using healing magic at some point. Instead, they went on one of their minor quests with the paladin. To give him his moment to shine, he did most of the heavy lifting on that quest but then left the group. He wouldn’t have made the story too complex by sticking around.
Easter Eggs
This movie is loaded with references to the game and tons of Easter eggs. Like I said, it’s more that than it is an actual movie. You can make a game out of spotting them.
EDIT: A Note on Faithfulness to the Game
Some have nitpicked the movie for not living up to game mechanics, and others have responded by saying “it’s a movie, not a game.” But it’s a movie that’s not only based on a game, but it has the name of the game in its title. If this is billed as a Dungeons & Dragons movie, then it should be based on the game. Otherwise, this might as well be a Game of Thrones or Lord of the Rings movie. Maybe it’s just overstatement typical among the way Americans (everyone?) argues, but the counterarguments don’t seem to appreciate that fact. In fact, someone well known in the industry was taken to task (by someone else I’ll say is well-known) for criticizing the movie. “Are you a cinematographer?” she asked. What difference does that make? Are we not permitted to criticize a movie because we aren’t professional filmmakers ourselves? And if so, wouldn’t that mean that you have no right to complement it unless you’re a professional filmmaker? Are we not allowed to voice our opinions without filmmaking experience? That seems ridiculous.
Still, even acknowledging all that, the first question you should ask is, “What edition of D&D?” The various editions of D&D are very different from one another. Which edition should the film emulate? The classic OD&D or 1e for reasons of appreciation of where we all come from? The current 5e for reasons of marketability? A combination of them all? How should that combination be weighted? Also of note, dungeon masters have always house-ruled their games, meaning my 1e may be very different from your 1e. And besides, there always has to be some license given to filmmakers adapting source material to another medium. So, lighten up, Francis. This isn’t going to be exactly the game you play, but it’s faithful enough to the source material that everyone recognizes it. If you don’t like it, fine. I’m clearly no Wizards of the Coast apologist. But if you don’t like it because you have an axe to grind, then you’re robbing yourself of fun. Don’t ruin ours.
Grade: B
It was fun. It was worth my time and money, but it could have been better. I’m sure we’ll get a sequel or two, so maybe those will be.
Play What You Want 