Let's roll some dice, watch some movies, or generally just geek out. New posts at 6:30 pm ET but only if I have something to say. Menu at the top. gsllc@chirp.enworld.org on Mastodon and @gsllc on Twitter.
If you enjoy this post, there’s something wrong with you.
And now for something really stupid.
New, overpriced Star WarsOreos! Will they be Jedi Oreos or Sith Oreos? Only those dumb enough to pay for the same exact cookie with an intellectual property markup will ever know.
Sorry Not sorry for the naughty word.
Somehow, this video received no copyright strike. Go figure.
As today is the real Star Wars Day and the only one that should be celebrated, I’ll tell you my story. Like all my childhood stories, there’s an element of sadness to it, but only in a “first world problem” sense. It’s not really a downer.
Star Wars: A New Hope was released eight days after my ninth birthday. I didn’t get to see it quickly, as it wasn’t a priority for my parents, and they didn’t want to wait in those ridiculous lines. However, the release was extended due to its popularity, so because they were interested in it themselves, I technically did see it when it was released. Unlike some of you, I don’t remember the exact date, but it was definitely (and obviously) during 1977.
My cousin, Kessel Junkie, and his older brother loved it, but their parents fostered that. They had the bed sheets, toys, etc. So, when it was re-released in the theaters, their parents planned to see it again. The day before, they were over at the house. I had helped out their mother in some way I don’t remember, and she returned me home. She asked me what I wanted in return. I responded, “Take me to see Star Wars.” Knowing how my family would react, I said it with deep and sincere sarcasm in my voice because I never imagined being able to see it in the theater a second time. Well, she enthusiastically responded, “Sure!” She knew that would absolutely pay the debt (so to speak) to me. My mother wasn’t pleased but was in a position where it would be awkward to disallow it. I’d pay for it later, but I didn’t care. So, I actually got to see it twice on the big screen. This was the nicest thing my aunt ever did for me (I don’t mean that as a backhanded compliment), and I always appreciated that.
Foreshadowing!
On Christmas of the year the Empire Strikes Back was released, Kessel Junkie‘s parents got me the novelization for Christmas. It was given to me at the large, extended family Christmas party we had every year, so there was no way to hide it. I immediately started reading it, ignoring the party, but obviously I couldn’t finish the entire novel that night. I was ridiculed every time I picked it up because it was childish (I was fucking 11 years old!), but because that didn’t work, it was confiscated within the week. I never did finish it. I imagine, just like many books, it improved on the story from the movie. I hadn’t thought about this in decades, so maybe I should buy and read it.
This wasn’t really the product of an anti-Star Wars attitude as much as it was just another excuse to crush my spirit, but they did even meaner things with Star Trek, so this had nothing to do with . . .
The “Rivalry”
Star Wars sucks!
“Star Trek >> Star Wars” is a phrase I use more than “My name is Rob,” but as Kessel Junkie will tell you, we’re both fans of both. I just prefer Star Trek, and he prefers Star Wars. But the only Star Wars that doesn’t appeal to me is the animated stuff (for reasons I’ve discussed before) and the Last Jedi (it reminds me too much of the OJ Simpson slow speed chase). Maybe my love of Star Trek is why Rogue One is my favorite Star Wars movie; it has a more Star Trek feel. In any event, don’t take it as an insult to the franchise. Star Wars continues to consistently put out great material, and they even adjust on the fly to cater to what the fans suddenly want to see (e.g., Ahsoka). To be fair, Star Trek did that with Strange New Worlds.
I really do love Star Wars, and you should never doubt that simply because . . .
Sundays are lazy days for me. Sometimes I post other people’s work. Sometimes, something silly. Usually both. Well, there’s nothing sillier than this. I post today only because this will become my 200th consecutive daily post. I’ve pulled this shit before, posting just to say that I’m continuing what would become a 374 day streak, but I post this to say my streak is ending. Very meta.
Okay, fine. Because you’re here, I should probably give you a stupid meme. Here’s one.
Nice mashup of two things I love. It’s not as if I had something important to say for most of the 199 before it (short of some of these).
Do you remember what happened the last time I celebrated Inktober? No? Well, you’re not going to like it. You’re certainly not go to like this one. You see, a friend posted to Facebook a list of Inktober assignments, and being the smartass I am, I’ve taken on (synonym: stolen) those assignments despite my . . . “modest” drawing skills. Look, mine will be funnier, okay? I’d link to his (which are going to be much better), but he protects his tweets. You’ll have to settle for mine.
He’s drawing for a charity by offering his drawings for sale, the proceeds for which go to the Stillbrave Childhood Cancer Foundation. Noble, but my choice of charity is the JDRF. Unfortunately, no one will buy my work, so until their link breaks, you can directly donate here. Or you can donate to Stillbrave. I won’t get angry. Here are the assignments:
My favorite episode of Star Trek, any series, is Balance of Terror from the original series. It has absolutely everything that a Star Trek episode should have, and it, along with my favorite Star Trek movie, the Wrath of Khan, inspired the best episode of Strange New Worlds to date, Memento Mori. For some reason, Balance of Terror keeps coming up in my social media streams. Several people keep saying something that prompts me to volunteer this information.
Or posting a silly meme.
But this post isn’t about Star Trek.
I set my mind to rewatch the episode but kept procrastinating. Yesterday, I was watching the Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi. I love both of those movies. It occurred to me that none of the X-Wings, Tie-Fighters, etc. had any aft-firing weaponry. That would have been quite useful when being chased during the attacks on either Death Star. The Millennium Falcon sort of did, but only if there was at least one other person on the ship available to mad that blaster. (If I’m wrong, I’m sure Kessel Junkie will correct me.)
But wait! This post is about Star Trek!
This led me to finally re-watch Balance of Terror (re-watching Memento Mori will follow soon) in which I thought there was some background chatter stating that the aft-firing torpedoes are ready. (Note: I may have been mistaken, but there were mentions to aft-firing weapons in the background charter of several episodes, most clearly at 17:02 of Arena.) It also led to a cascade of thoughts regarding the hubbub about violating canon. I love the FASA Star Trek RPG, and it annoyed me that the Constitution Class starships didn’t have aft-firing weaponry. In fact, they made a big deal out of it. It was a glaring weakness in most Federation ships, and a big deal when some did. But it’s not all about an RPG. Star Trek the Motion Picture also suggested that the Klingon ship (also captained by Mark Lenard) having an aft-firing torpedo was a big deal. He thought it would surprise his enemy.
Right emotion; wrong guy.
And then there are those star dates that were completely made up, and the fact that the Romulan ship in Balance of Terror wasn’t capable of warp travel (22:10) yet traveled in interstellar space. In the two episodes I mentioned, there was an inconsistency. In Arena, Kirk comments that diamonds are “perhaps the hardest substance known in the universe” (30:10), and Spock confirms this by stating, “diamonds, the hardest known substance” (41:32), yet Spock points out only four episodes earlier in Balance of Terror that “cast rodinium . . . is the hardest substance known to our science” (21:26). Canon is shit. That’s unfortunate in most (not all) cases, but it’s true. You can’t rely on it. However, one theory says that there’s no such thing as a canon violation because Star Trek First Contact rebooted the franchise, rendering “canon” a nonsense concept.
I love to see Strange New Worlds show aft-firing phasers, see everyone lose their shit for the canon violation, and then lay into them for their ignorance. If everyone now realizes that the Enterprise has aft-firing weapons, that’s fine too. It gives us one more reason to say Star Trek ships are better than Star Wars ships.
Just roll with it and be happy when stories are well-written.
Sundays now are lazy days for me. I either post something silly or other people’s work. Usually both. Today, it’s both. Just like in the prequels, we’re constantly learning about the extent of R2-D2’s utility.
Episode 3 of The Book of Boba Fett (“TBoBF“) touched off a storm of discussion on social media, and it’s continued through episode 4. I’ve engaged in that discussion quite a bit but am collecting my thoughts here.
First off, you can hate TBoBF. This post isn’t saying otherwise, which would be really stupid. You like what you like, and you can’t help that any more than I can help that I liked the Green Lantern movie. You can explain why you hate it, but that explanation might serve as the reason I like it. Different strokes and all that. I also don’t see anything wrong with expressing your opinion. Expressing hate is no or less moral than expressing like or love. It’s just your opinion, and if I open the door to hearing it, I shouldn’t shut it because I don’t agree. Frylock’s Gaming & Geekery is bubble-free.
But if you can state your opinion, I can state mine.
Here’s what I don’t get: Boba Fett isn’t a character. If this were a copyright suit, and I were the judge, I’d throw you in jail (even without the power to do so) just for suggesting otherwise. He has four lines of dialogue, six minutes of airtime, and a really cool-looking suit. Okay, maybe five lines if you count a childish scream.
“Presenting the most overrated character // anyone ever saw // with five lines in the trilogy // and one of them was AAAAAHHHHH!!!!”
Of all of that, his suit is the sole reason we liked him as kids. In copyright terms, he’s not a character; he’s a sculpture.
So in what way does this show “ruin” the character of Boba Fett?
It doesn’t. There’s nothing to ruin except the suit, but the suit’s still there. What it ruins is the head canon that you’ve created, representing your assignment of various traits to him, most of which contradict the few traits we see in him. For example, the one time we see him in combat in Return of the Jedi, he gets his ass kicked. He’s not the bad ass your mind extrapolated in childhood. To a child, no one in such a cool suit could possibly be so pathetic, but as an adult, you should know better.
This doesn’t mean that it would have been wrong to make him something other than a conflicted anti-hero. He could have been written as a straight-up villain, and even I’m getting a bit annoyed with Hollywood’s obsession with the anti-hero. There are so many of them that they collectively paint the cinematic world as a place with no heroes. That’s too close to reality. But Disney doesn’t give a shit what you’ve extrapolated onto the character. They can’t. There are too many of you, and you all have different extrapolations, ranging from subtle to monumental differences of opinion. They have to do their own thing, and so far there’s nothing inconsistent about the character because there isn’t enough “character” to contradict.
Now, if you want at least some character development, you could go to the prequels. Did you want this to be about Boba Fett as a child? Because that’s how you get a series about Boba Fett as a child. (Actually, some of you nerds would probably like that. Freaking nerds and your child protagonists.) I’m also aware that he appeared in one or more of the animated series, none of which I’ve watched. I can’t comment on that, but neither I nor (apparently) Disney care. My only concern is live-action media. In light of that, everything I said above stands.
The bottom line is that Disney has created an interesting character and story, and some (not all) of you could appreciate that if you didn’t place your head canon above all else and instead could just enjoy the ride. I appreciate that many of you would still not enjoy it. Well . . .
The world doesn’t revolve around you. If you don’t like it, you’ll just have to watch something else. I am, and I’m not angry at Paramount for it.
Sundays now are lazy days for me. I either post something silly or other people’s work. Usually both. Today, it’s a meme appropriate to the aftermath of Christmas.
Okay, I take that back. There’s nothing “appropriate” about this meme.
Play What You Want 